Posts Tagged ‘Giorgio Armani’

The other day I was headed to the East Side as I had been reliably informed of an Old Monk sighting there.  Apparently, a liquor store in Murray Hill carried my portly friend.  I was walking East on 57th Street I heard a car honking furiously.  At first I thought nothing of it, as its as natural as breathing to hear cars honk incessantly when walking around this city.  But this guy would not stop; he slowed down and pulled towards the curb like he was trying to get my attention, almost running me over in the process. He was shouting in Italian “scusa puoi essere mio amico” or something to that effect and continued in Italian like I knew exactly what he was saying.  I stopped and looked at him blankly but he continued chattering away in a very excited manner, all the while gesturing and smiling too.  Finally I said “Non parlo italiano”. He stopped mid sentence and looked at me totally shocked. Then he said in English, with a very think Italian accent, “yooo are naught Itaaalian?” I said “no, I am not.”  He was well dressed, young-ish and driving a big black SUV.  I imagined he wanted help with directions to the airport or something like that.

As I prepared to give him directions to JFK, he instead asked me “what I did?”  A little surprised, I answered that I was not working at the moment.  He then asked what I did with my time.  I told him, honestly, that I walked around the city looking for a specific brand of alcohol.  He laughed and looked at me quizzically like I was joking but seeing that my expression did not change, he chose wisely not to dwell on the employment issue any longer.  Instead he asked if I would help him out with a small problem he had.  By now I seriously doubted he was looking for directions.  I thought to myself here comes the sob story followed by the request for any money I can spare.  I guess things are so bad that they are even hitting up unemployed people now.  But he didn’t and instead pointed to the back of his SUV and told me that he was a salesman for Giorgio Armani.  He said he had was in the city for some show and was flying back to Milan that evening and would have to pay duty if he took the suits back with him.  To avoid this he had decided to give away these beautiful $3,000 Armani suits for almost nothing.  And it must really have been my lucky day because he also told me that the suits he had just happened to be my size!

Sadly, the liquor store in Murray Hill did not result in ending my quest.  The Indian store owner told me that he used to carry the Monk but that the distributor just stopped showing up one day.  So I returned once again empty handed – no Monk and no Armani suits in hand.